Monday, July 11, 2005

dirty feet bothers me

I just read an article on Sina about "10 Things Women Should Not Do In Bed". It's a good read, if you can decipher Traditional Chinese. I supposed you can cut and paste the article into Google or Babelfish translators, and attempt to piece together the gibber-English-hilarity that ensues. The link to the article is here.

Here is my quick attempt at a summary:
1. Don't make fake noises, such as fake, screaming orgasms.
2. Don't be like a "dead fish", move and enjoy. Even rape victims struggle. (this is from the article)
3. Don't talk about your daily routines, trials and tribulations in the act of lovemaking.
4. Mind the smell - brush and shower. Nobody likes to eat garlic and have sex at the same time.
5. Don't bring up fears of pregnancy or marriage in the middle of the act.
6. Turn off the TV. He don't want to think you are looking at David Hasselhoff...
7. No yawning.
8. Wear makeup - especially if you're ugly without it.
9. No farting. It destroys the mood.
10. Others - no laughing, make sure you know the other persons name if you're like to call them out loudly...

On a side note, I realized that in lots of porn the women have dirty feet. It's like they walk around the set barefoot, put on the high heels for a shoot, and when the shoes come off the sole of their feet are black.

I hate that.

wash your feet before getting into bed Posted by Picasa


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